Quotes - More UKC Quotes

< Vroomfondel> as root: service sshd disable
< Vroomfondel> er
< Vroomfondel> also wrong chan
< zenith> :o
< Joe> sudo systemctl stop Vroomfondel 
< Ritsuka> Joe: Vroomfondel is too old-skool to use systemctl
< Ritsuka> booting him probably requires POKEing memory addresses by hand
< zenith> how do you even do that?
< Vroomfondel> you have to twist both my nipples to flood the chamber and then pull my starting handle
< Ritsuka> where is your starting... oh
< zenith> what grade of fuel?
< Ritsuka> 69
< zenith> is that vintage?
< bunu> graymalkin: http://m.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-32009961
< Gwyn> Title: London protesters 'chase UKIP leader Farage out of pub' - BBC News
< bunu> Ritsuka: unfortunatly Vroomfondel's starting handle is out of comission at the moment, apparantly something to do with structural integrity
< Vroomfondel> it got over-used
< bunu> it cannot even hold itself up these days
< bunu> Vroomfondel: ;)
< Vroomfondel> 'm not *that* old yet
< bunu> Vroomfondel: there is no need to hide the truth here
< Vroomfondel> if I admit to age-related diseases I just make xand and Tim look bad because they're much older
#585 Posted under kent #cs on 2015-03-22 20:15

< Joe> http://m.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-31871532
< Gwyn> Title: Illegal immigrants smuggled out of UK and back again - BBC News
< Joe> pfft what
< zenith> is that to avoid being deported?
< Joe> yes
< zenith> haha, if deported the government pays for the transport doesn't it?
< Joe> I wouldn't know
< zenith> i guess they are saving the tax payer money by doing that
< Ritsuka> the government really needs to employ Elbonian Air to send illegal immigrants home
< Joe> ryanair would suffice
< Ritsuka> Joe: that's going too far
< zenith> lol
< bunu> nobody should have to suffer ryanair
#584 Posted under kent #cs on 2015-03-19 20:55

< bunu>  there was a porno filmed on campus?
< Dark-Side> yes
< Dark-Side> in parkwood mostly
< bunu> when was this
< Dark-Side> Awhile ago
* bunu did not know this
< Ritsuka> bunu: i'm sure you can be in the sequel
< Ritsuka> (holy crud, i so nearly wrote SQL)
< bunu> lol
< zenith> Ritsuka++
< Ritsuka> database porn
< bunu> Ritsuka: an aquired taste
< Ritsuka> bunu: unenforced foreign keys, the ultimate taboo
< bunu> i here the sub genre of austrian mideget database porn is making a comeback
< Ritsuka> bunu: how are they selected for the role?
< bunu> SELECT * FROM …
< Vroomfondel> grant role ...
< zenith> s/r/i/ ; s/e/l/
< Marvin> giant role ...
< Dark-Side> thats what she said
< Ritsuka> select * from PornStars where midget = 1 and austrian = 1;
< bunu> Ritsuka: could be a large cast
< Penguin> limit = 5;
< bunu> Penguin: well that scuppers the final scene then
< Penguin> gonna have a scene based on snow white and the seven dwarfs?
< bunu> Penguin: how did you guess
* bunu forces Penguin to sign a gag order
< Ritsuka> not THAT kind of gag order
< bunu> Ritsuka: shit did i confuse the two
< bunu> which one was Penguin meant to get
< Ritsuka> well, the paper one is over there
< bunu> i knew something wasnt quite right
#583 Posted under kent #cs on 2015-03-13 16:48

< Gargravarr> https://www.confused.com/BRIAN-the-robot <-- not to be outdone by Compare The Meerkat
< Exobot> Title: BRIAN the Robot - Confused.com
<@Dark-Side> I like Brian the robot more
< Gargravarr> they all have irritating as all hell marketing campaigns now
< matx> Why does everything have to come with a free toy?
< Gargravarr> matx: cos people won't buy it otherwise
<@Dark-Side> Blame McDonalds
< matx> macdonalds do insurance now?
< Gargravarr> dear god, the Happy Meal generation are growing up, aren't they
#582 Posted under #cs on 2015-03-02 17:32

< Penguin> Marvin: meep
< Marvin> Penguin: Pengwin| has no effect. but as I opened it in unobtanium
< bunu> Marvin: dont leave us hanging, you opened Penguin and?
< Marvin> bunu: well consider its origin...
< Ritsuka> considering Penguin's origin, i don't think we want to know what happened when he was opened
#581 Posted under #cs kent on 2015-02-19 11:12

< bunu> xand: Vroomfondel IS_people: why is the uni email getting so much spam recently for increasing mail box size?
< Ritsuka> nobody was paying attention to the increasing penis size ones?
< Ritsuka> (assuming because they realised students couldn't afford it anyway)
< bunu> Ritsuka: i missed those ones, damn
< Ritsuka> bunu: click [here] to enlarge your penis! please your missus!
< Ritsuka> all major credit cards and PayPal accepted via XSS
* bunu desperatly tries to get irssi to accept mouse inputs
#580 Posted under #cs kent on 2015-02-12 21:04

< bunu> Penguin: i completly forgot Marvin64 was piperbot
< Marvin64> From CBW --> AFK?
< bunu> Marvin64: stop talking shit
< Marvin64> bunu: is that allowed?
< ayleid> he has a good point.
#579 Posted under #cs kent on 2015-02-11 11:20

< matx> my lady just greeted me with "ello". She seems to have misplaced her H.
<@Dark-Side> m'lady?
< ayleid> it's the name of one of his servers
< ayleid> my lady greets me with "Password for ayleid:"
< zenith> one of my exs greeted me with "<DEL> :BIOS Setup <F9> :XpressRecovery2 <F12> :Boot Menu <End> :Qflash"
< ayleid> what happened to her?
< Gargravarr> he flashed her
#578 Posted under #cs on 2015-02-10 15:02

< graymalkin> !tell ntm (.+)__mnt_cl-moodle-nfs_moodle2014data_temp_turnitintooltwo_(.+)_(\d+)_(\w+)\.(.+)
< cake> graymalkin: OK, I'll give ntm your message.
< Ritsuka> s/\(.+$/graymalkin should not be allowed to regex/
< PiperBot> !tell ntm graymalkin should not be allowed to regex
< cake> PiperBot: OK, I'll give ntm your message.
< Ritsuka> hehe
< Tatskaari> Wow, you are an evil bastard
< Ritsuka> why thank you
< Tatskaari> as
< Tatskaari> s/as/!tell ntm Ritsuka should not be allowed to piperbot/
< PiperBot> !tell ntm Ritsuka should not be allowed to piperbot
< cake> PiperBot: OK, I'll give ntm your message.
#577 Posted under #cs kent on 2015-01-22 15:00

<@Dark-Side> I don't like the "Don't poke the hornets nest" style analogy
<@Dark-Side> It implies leaving them well alone to be nutty fuckers
<@Dark-Side> instead of what you do with hornets
<@Dark-Side> which is burn the fuckers
<@Dark-Side> burn them to the ground
<@Dark-Side> burn every single last one of the cunts
<@Dark-Side> Espically those Japanese hornets
<@Dark-Side> have you seen them bastards?!
< zenith> they're massive
< zenith> and their stings are poisonous
<@Dark-Side> They're called Japanese giant hornets
<@Dark-Side> of course they're massive
< Gargravarr> because peace isn't good for population control
< Gargravarr> French hornets can supposedly kill with 5 stings
<@Dark-Side> Yeah but they wave a white flag as soon as you look at them :P
<@Dark-Side> Those Japansese hornets though
<@Dark-Side> they'll kamikaze the fuck out of you
#576 Posted under #cs on 2015-01-19 11:59

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